Death to the Opposition.

Kirk quickly checked the corridor again before turning to the small recessed alcove that housed the selection display. He wasted no time in calling up “Creams, Lotions, and Oils,” and scanned it as rapidly as he could. There. “Cream Suitable for Anal Intercourse.” Decisively he punched in “one” for quantity and waited while the machine hummed a bit and processed his order. Within ten seconds there was a clang, much too loud for his tastes, as his order rolled down the chute and banged against the door.

ahahahahah I cannot